So you want to fight a Hipster?

Beatle Hipsters

Description: A “Hipster” is a type of young person that believes in counter-culture for the sake of counter-culture. They manage to live as both main-stream and underground simultaneously (see: American Apparel). While most Hipster populations are centered around New York and San Francisco, smaller chunks can be observed nearby any coffee house in America. The tale-tale sign of a Hipster is a V-neck shirt or male scarf (again, see: American Apparel).

The “Hipster” is a being of contradiction, making them a very tricky opponent to say the least. Their fighting style is the equivalent of a Samurai using a Colt .45. But, seeing as you’ll most likely want to punch at least one of the Hipsters life throws at you, you might as well win.

Ultimate Technique: Upper/Middle Class Background


  • Dress like a regular person.
  • Be totally cool with the Hipster’s views and ideas (Marxism, Vegetarianism etc.).
  • Watch their heads blow up in the face of main-stream acceptance.

Best Weapon Against It: Actual Hardship

Tips: Smash their phone. They will lose their shit and therefore their powers.

Warning: Never try to reason with a Hipster. You’ll never get a word in edgewise.


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